


How Northern Ireland Came to be

by TheTwilightZoneDrone



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Comedy, Headcanon, Nationverse, Other, Personal Canon, Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:35:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29876424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTwilightZoneDrone/pseuds/TheTwilightZoneDrone
Summary: This is how I imagined the representation of Northern Ireland coming into existence.
Kudos: 5





	How Northern Ireland Came to be

EXT. FIELD. BORDER BETWEEN IRELAND AND NORTHERN IRELAND. 1921.

Ireland was standing on one side of the border while England, Scotland, and Wales were on the other side.

ENGLAND. (Hands behind his back in a commander like manner.)

Ireland. Thank you for joining us today in the finalization of your...

IRELAND. (Bored.)

Ya. Ya. Let’s get this over with.

Ireland took a big swing from his flask.

ENGLAND. (Offended)

Did you seriously bring alcohol with you to a political negation?

IRELAND. (Shrugs)

It’s medicinal

SCOTLAND. (Mutters.)

Can’t believe he got independence before me.

WALES.

Now Scotland…

SCOTLAND.

Seriously he drunk most of the day. How was he agile enough to beat up England. Scratch that how did he have time to plan.

ENGLAND.

He didn't beat me up. I was just weakened by the Great War.

SCOTLAND.

Oh, so I all have to do to earn my independence is to wait for another world war. Good to know.

ENGLAND.

I wouldn’t be so sure. This war was so Great, it will probably be centuries or even never before another one like this will happen again.

IRELAND. (He uses the palm of his hand to rub the right side of his forehead.)

God you guys are such a headache. Can we just get the over with so I can separate?

ENGLAND.

Right as you know my bosses let you have your independence …

IRELAND.

After I kicked your ass.

ENGLAND.

...in exchange for a piece of your land.

England then brings out the ax he was hiding behind his back.

ENGLAND.

So I’m here to collect that piece.

IRELAND.

You’ve got to be kidding me?

ENGLAND.

I’m afraid not. But since you are my brother I’ll let you choose the part you would want to part ways with.

IRELAND. (His eyes closed as he rubs his temples)

What are you even going to do with it?

ENGLAND.

I’ll put it over my mantilla place to remind me of our time together.

IRELAND.

Your such a pretentious dick.

ENGLAND.

And your a drunken hick who has terrible taste in music!

IRELAND.

Hay! My music is amazing and majestic. And unlike you, I don’t need to steal others work.

ENGLAND. (He lifts up his ax.)

Why you….

WALES. (Annoyingly coughs.)

We can’t afford another war.

ENGLAND.

Look hows about I take your left leg?

IRELAND.

Hows about I give you a finger.

Ireland stuck out his middle finger up to England’s unamazed face.

ENGLAND.

Works for me.

WALES.

Now wait a minute isn’t there another way that doesn’t involve bodily harm.

ENGLAND.

Stay out of this Wales.

WALES.

No. Can’t you just let Ireland have his freedom without compensation.

ENGLAND.

No. Then I would be sending the message that anyone can just leave the British Empire without consciousness.

SCOTLAND.

What empire were the only ones still part of the….

ENGLAND.

I still have some territories!

SCOTLAND.

Ah is the brat upset.

ENGLAND.

I’m not upset. I’m pissed off!

WALES.

Look can we just please get back to…

ENGLAND & SCOTLAND.

Stay out of this Wales!

Ireland's head was pounding as he heard his three brothers arguments combine into disoriented static submerge in water.

IRELAND.

Oi! SHUT UP!

SFX. POP.

Suddenly, his green, right eye popped right out of his head, bouncing on the ground a few times before it settled into a gentle roll across the border. The eye was stopped by a little clover. Everybody looked a mix of shock, terror, and disgusted.

WALES.

M-maybe we can put it back….

The eye then sinks into the ground along with the four leaf clover. The isle brothers were speechless.

SFX. BOOM.

Everybody took a step back after the ground exploded. They all heard a low hum as the smoke cleared away and saw a little one year ginger dressed in a green night gown, whose hair covered his left eye along with a clover shaped cowlick planted in the middle of his head, blowing raspberries. Everyone was frozen in shock but England quickly snapped out of it.

ENGLAND. (Smiling.)

This is perfect!

England threw back his ax, unknowingly hitting Scotland who got knocked out cold by it. England smiled and crouched down near the child. Everything was a bubbly tint as he held out both hands in anticipation that the little one will accept him.

ENGLAND. (Sweet and Smiling.)

Hello there little one. I’m your new br--

Before he could finish, the child smiles as he slaps England’s hand away. A sad purple cloud envelopes a devastated England as he sits on the grass with his back away and his knees close to his chest.

The child the waddles around taking in his surrounds. He looks up at Ireland, who is looking back at him with shock. The child smiles and jumps on Ireland’s left leg.

Ireland, terrified, lifts up his left leg trying to shake whatever this was off his leg. But instead of it’s grab loosening. It started to climb.

IRELAND. (Terrified.)

No. No. No. You live over there. Go over there.

Ireland then picks up the child and yeets him across the border. Moments later, the child returns laughing and smiling pulling on Ireland’s pants to signal he wants to be picked up. Ireland then throws the child again and the results were the same. So he does it again only throwing the child harder. He waits around for awhile for the coast to be clear. Ireland runs his fingers through his hair after he’s 100% sure that the one year old got the message.

IRELAND.

Right, it was _so nice_ [he said through his teeth] to meet with you all again. Scotland [who was still unconscious]. Wales [who was still so confused]. England [who was still devastated.] I hope we never speak to each other again. Now if you excuse me I’m going to enjoy my independence.

Ireland turns his back to reveal to that child is hanging off his shoulders. But Ireland unknowingly just walks away, leaving Wales to deal with the aftermath.

WALES.

What the bloody hell just happened?

**Author's Note:**

> The reason that I imagine Northern Ireland coming from Ireland's eye is because potatoes. Potatoes have these things called eyes where either by cutting them off or by natural budding a new potato is created.


End file.
